Who am I?
by weirdo1984
Summary: Willow doesn't remember who she is
1. Chapter 1

Title: Who am I?

Author: weirdo1984

Disclaimer: I own none, all belong to Joss Whedon  
Comments: Always welcomed!

Summary: Willow doesn't remember who she is

Warnings/Spoilers: None

Chapter 1

Willow slowly woke her head feeling fuzzy. She looked around the room and realized that she was in a run down motel room. She didn't remember how she got there, actually she couldn't remember anything.

"Who am I?" she asked herself. She looked around for a purse but didn't find one. She stood and dug though her pockets and pulled out a crumpled business card.

"Angel Investigations," Willow read aloud. There was an L.A address written on the card, "So I am in Los Angeles?"

She walked to the door before opening it and walking out. The motel sign said Los Angeles Inn.

"Ok so I am in Los Angeles. Maybe this Angel can tell me what is going on." Willow said looking at the card again.

She got a cab and was on her way to the business. She asked the cab drive to wait a minute so she could get some money to pay him. Walking in, she saw a pretty brunette sitting behind a computer and a male brunette sitting beside her.

"Um, hello?" the confused redhead said

"Willow?" Cordy asked, "What are you doing here?"

The brunette girl walked over to her friend and went for a hug making Willow backed away.

"Who are you?" The redhead asked.

"Haha funny Wills." Cordy said and went for another hug and again Willow moved.

"Red what are you doing?" Doyle asked walking around.

"Red? Who are you?" She repeated.

"Willow, stop it that isn't funny." Cordy scolded folding her arms over her chest.

"Stop what?" Willow asked

"The act of not knowing us." Doyle said

"But I don't." Willow said, "Look I have this card, and I need some money to pay for my cab. Can you help me?"

"Doyle why don't you go and get Angel and I will go and pay the driver." Cordy suggest. She was very confused and didn't understand what was going on with Willow.

"Right," Doyle said before sending a concerned look to Cordelia and headed downstairs.

When Angel heard someone enter his apartment he walked out of his room.

"We have a client?" Angel asked running a hand through his hair.

"No, actually Willow is here." Doyle replied.

"Really?" Angel asked happily. He and Willow started dating seven months ago.

"Angel, she says she doesn't remember who she is and she doesn't remember us." Doyle informed his boss.

"What?" Angel asked bewildered. He ran upstairs and saw his redhead sitting on the chair.

"Kitten are you alright?" Angel asked walking over to her. He lifted her up and started to search for any injuries.

"Um… excuse me. Do you mind not touching me?" Willow said and moved away from him to the other side of the room.

Angel heart broke she really didn't remember them.

"And could we possibly stick with one name? I don't know about kitten and Red." Willow requested as she sat back down.

"Willow do you remember anything?" Cordy asked.

"No." The redhead shook her head. "I didn't even know my name till I came here."

"We should phone Giles." Doyle said.

"Who?" Willow asked.

"He is a friend from Sunny Dale." Angel answered.

"Ok. Do I live in Sunny Dale?" Willow asked.

"Yes." Angel said. "You don't remember anything?"

"Sorry no." Willow replied, "Are we friends?"

"You are with Cordy and me." Doyle said and then became uncomfortable.

"You and I aren't friends?" Willow asked looked at Angel.

"Yes and no." Angel answered.

"I don't understand." Willow said

"You and I are dating." Angel shifted nervously.

"We are?" Willow questioned.

"Yes we have been together for seven months." Angel answered.

"I'm sorry I don't remember." The redhead truly did look miserable.

"We'll find out what happened." Cordy promised.

Doyle went and called Sunny Dale.

"Can you guys tell me anything that might help me remember?" Willow asked.

Cordy and Angel looked at each other awkwardly.

"What? You guys are my friends aren't you?" Willow asked uncertain.

"Yes Willow we are." Cordy answered.

"What's the problem then?" The redhead asked.

"It just it's complicated." Angel said.

"What do you mean?" Willow asked.

Angel ran his hand through his hair. "What we are about to tell you is going to be difficult to take in." Angel replied.

"Ok." Willow said nervously.

Doyle entered the room.

"Did you get a hold of them?" Cordy asked.

"Yes. Willow was suppose to meet at Giles this morning but never showed. No one had seen her since yesterday morning." Doyle informed.

"Yesterday morning?" Angel asked slightly angry.

"Angel remember Willow has a bunch of finals coming up. She has been staying at her parents place for quiet." Cordy reminded.

"Oh. Right." Angel said sheepishly. When it came to his redhead he was protective.

"So can you tell me anything that can help me remember?" Willow asked.

"Yes." Angel said.

"Ok Willow remember you need to have an open mind for what we are going to tell you." Cordy said.

"Ok." Willow said.

"You live in Sunny Dale. You have your whole life." Angel started. "You are best friends with Xander and Buffy."

Willow nodded not recognizing the names.

"In High school Buffy moved to Sunny Dale and that is when you and Xander's lives changed forever." Angel continued.

"How?" Willow asked.

"Buffy is a vampire slayer." Angel said.

"Oh come on." Willow said, "I may not remember anything but I am not dumb."

"Willow everything we say is the truth." Cordy said.

"Ok continue." Willow said and waved her hand at them.

"Giles is or was her watcher, he would train her. You and Xander found out about vampires and other demons not long after Buffy arrived. You were at the bronze one night, and a boy approached you. He was a vampire and Buffy was able to kill him before he could kill you." Cordy said.

Willow sat their silent. "Ok." She finally said. Having a feeling there was more.

"Doyle and I are not human, not completely anyway." Angel said and looked over at Doyle.

"What do you mean? You look human." Willow said

"I am a vampire, I was cursed with a soul over eighty years ago, and Doyle is half demon." Angel replied.

"Uh huh." Willow replied with scepticism.

"We can show you." Doyle said.

"Ok." The redhead said looking at them.

Both Angel and Doyle transformed into their demon side.

Willow sat there starting at them and oddly enough she was not scared. Both men returned to their human faces.

"You and Xander help Buffy with slaying and research. You are a witch and a powerful one at that." Doyle stated.

"I am a witch?" Willow asked.

"Yes." Angel nodded.

"And Xander?" Willow questioned.

"What about Xander?" Angel asked.

"What is he?" Willow asked.

"He is just your run of the mill twenty year old guy, but he is dating a vampire." Cordy explained.

"He is?" Willow asked. Again she was shocked that she didn't find this odd.

"Yes. He is my grand childe. He and Spike have been dating for five months." Angel explained.

"He has a soul like you?" Willow asked trying to get as much information as she could.

"No. he was taken by the Initiative, and was experimented on. They put a chip in his head so if he tries to harm a human he will have a big headache." Cordy said. "He was able to escape and went to you guys for help. You took him in and he found out he was able to kill demons, so he began helping you. He and Xander became close and now are dating." Doyle explained.

Willow nodded again.

"Buffy is dating Riley he was part of the initiative but no longer works with them." Cordy said.

"Does any of this sounding familiar?" Angel asked.

"No sorry but for some reason I don't find this odd." Willow replied.

"That must mean somewhere deep down you do remember." Angel said hopefully.

"Why don't we head to Sunny Dale maybe something there will jog your memory." Cordy suggested.

"Yeah Giles and the rest of the gang have been worrying." Doyle said.

"Ok." Willow replied. She saw Angel looking at her and saw love and worry in his eyes. She wished she could remember him.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

They arrived outside Giles's apartment just after nine. They walked up to the door and Xander pulled the door open startling the guests.

"Willow, are you alright?" Xander asked letting them in.

"Kind of." Willow answered, "Xander?"

"Yes." Xander nodded.

"Have you guys found anything?" Angel asked as they sat down.

"Not a thing. We don't understand what could have happened." Giles said.

"Red do any of us look familiar?" Spike asked.

"Spike please call her Willow she isn't sure how she feels about the nicknames." Angel said.

"Oh right. Sorry. Willow do any of us look familiar?" Spike asked.

"No I'm sorry." Willow said sadly as she looked over the group.

"It's ok Willow." Buffy said, "You will remember, we'll find out what happened."

"It's been a long day, why don't you take Willow to her place so she can get some sleep."  
Xander suggested he pulled out a set of keys from his pocket and handed them to Angel.

"Thanks." Angel nodded.

"Why don't we meet here tomorrow at noon? We can go through some pictures and see if that doesn't jog any memories." Giles proposed.

"Sounds good," Willow answered hoping something… anything would come back to her.

The four left the house and headed to Willow's. Once they arrived Angel unlocked the door and they all walked into the living room. "Willow, are you hungry?" Angel asked.

"Yeah can we order Chinese?" Willow asked.

"Of course," Angel replied. He ordered his redhead her favourite's chicken balls and ginger beef. The food arrived shortly after.

"Mmmm this is good." Willow said digging into the ginger beef.

"It's your favourite." Angel said

"Oh yeah I can see this as a favourite!" Willow answered with a smile on her face before eating some more.

"So Willow does your place look familiar?" Doyle asked.

"No but it looks like it should be in a life time magazine." Willow said scrunching up her nose in distaste.

"You're parents like to have the best." Doyle replied.

"This is the best?" Willow asked. "Where are my parents?"

"We don't know your parents are always traveling. You have basically raised yourself." Cordy informed her.

"Oh ok," Willow said no surprise in her voice.

"Why don't we get some sleep?" Doyle recommended, "Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

"Good idea." Angel said. He showed Willow to her room.

"This room is completely different from the rest of the house." Willow noted.

"You never let your parents do anything to your room, you wanted it the way you wanted it." Angel explained. "Try and get some sleep."

"Thank you." Willow said.

"You never have to thank me." Angel smiled. "See you in the morning."'

"Good night." Willow said.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The next morning Willow woke up. She had, had weird dreams all night. Willow showered and changed before heading downstairs.

"Morning Willow," Cordy greeted pouring a cup of coffee for herself.

"Morning," Willow said following suit.

"How did you sleep?" Doyle asked.

"Ok I guess I had some odd dreams." Willow replied.

"What kind of dreams?" Angel asked walking into the kitchen.

"Um there was one where Buffy, another girl and me. We were all tied to stakes or something and we were set on fire." Willow said.

"That was our senior year in high school. There was a demon that took shape of two little kids who died there was witch craft involved or so the town thought. Amy was the other girl. You and her use to do some spells together, and Buffy's mom knew about her being the slayer. They found some spell books and things in your locker. The towns' people were burning all books that had anything to do with witch craft and you, Buffy and Amy. Giles and I got there and put out the fire, but before we could Amy did a spell and turned herself into a rat." Cordy explained.

"Ok." Willow nodded.

"What other dreams did you have?" Doyle asked.

"Did we really burn down our high school?" Willow asked.

"Yes, do you remember the big snake?" Angel asked.

"Yeah," Willow replied unsure of where this was going.

"He was the mayor and a demon that had been around for a long time. So we got all the seniors together and stopped him during graduation, but we had to blow up the school to kill him." Angel responded.

"Ok." Willow said registering the information. "Any some really ugly demon named Moloch we were dating?"

"Not dating, dating. You were chatting online. He wanted to be with you he had possessed a class mate and he kidnapped you. Buffy and Xander were able to get to you and save you." Cordy said.

"Right," Willow said and shook her head, she couldn't believe how none of this was freaking her out.

"Why don't we head over to Giles's?" Doyle suggested.

"Ok." Willow said.

"I'll meet you there." Angel said.

They all started their way to the ex-watchers place.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

They reached the apartment fifteen minutes later, Angel was already there.

"Hello Willow how are you feeling?" Giles asked handing her a cup of tea.

"Ok I had some dream, memories last night." Willow said and went on to tell them what she saw.

"Well it's good that some memories are coming back." Spike said from his place on the couch beside Xander.

"There are some good memories though right?" Willow asked

"Yes." Buffy answered.

"Why don't we look at some photos?" Xander asked.

"Ok." Willow said.

They spent the next couple hours looking at photos. Willow would ask questions. She had learned about her other friend Jesse.

"Who are they?" Willow asked pointing to a picture.

"They are friends of mine." Riley said, "They work at the Initiative."

"They seem familiar some how." Willow stated.

"It will come to you." Angel said putting his hand on her shoulder. Willow smiled at him.

"Why don't we hit the Bronze?" Cordy suggested. "We use to spend a lot time there in high school."

"Sure." Willow shrugged.

"Even if you don't remember anything we can still talk and have some fun." Xander said.

"Yeah sounds good." Willow said.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

It has been over two months since Willow lost her memory. Bits and pieces were coming back but nothing to state what had happened.

Willow walked into her kitchen. Everyone was there it had become a regular thing everyone would come over in the morning to see if the redhead remembered. Willow walked over to Angel and gave him a kiss then went to make some toast.

Everyone stared at the redhead. That was the first time she had kissed Angel since the whole thing started.

"Wills?" Xander asked.

"Yeah Xan?" Willow asked looking up.

"Do you realize what you just did?" Cordy asked

"Yeah I kissed Angel." Willow said.

"Exactly." Giles said.

Willow looked confused for a second, "Oh my God. I remember!"

Angel jumped up and ran to his redhead and gave her a passionate kiss that she returned.

"Red can you tell us what happened?" Spike asked.

"The Initiative they kidnapped me. I was walking home from the library I needed some books to study. Graham walked up to me and put something over my mouth. When I woke I was in a white room and they were doing experiments on me. I was trying to use magic so they couldn't get into my head. The magic and whatever they were doing must have mixed badly." Willow remembered.

"Do you have any idea what they were doing?" Riley asked.

"No they never said anything." Willow said.

"So once they realized that Wills lost her memory they took all her ID and drove her to L.A dumping her at that motel. Thinking she wouldn't find away home, but she had Angel's card in her pocket." Cordy said.

"We have to be careful they may want to get Willow back into the lab to finish what they started." Doyle said.

"So I continue to pretend I don't know you?" Willow asked unhappily.

"Afraid so." Buffy said.

"How are we going to find out what they want with Wills?" Xander asked.

"I have no idea." Giles said.

"I wish the Initiative never came here." Willow said.

"Yeah me too." Angel said wrapping his arm around her.

"Why don't we hit the bronze tonight, just relax." Cordy suggested.

"Sounds like a plan." Spike said and gave Xander a kiss.

That night they were all at the bronze. Everyone was dancing. Willow hated the fact that she couldn't touch Angel.

"I need to use the restroom I will be right back." Willow said and headed to the bath room.

"Willow." Someone called her name. She turned around.

"Uh… Graham right?" Willow asked.

"Yeah I was just wondering how you were doing." Graham said.

"Ok I guess. It's been hard. I still don't remember anything." Willow said hoping she sounded truthful.

"Well I hope you get your memory back soon." Graham said and left.

Willow forgot she needed to use the bathroom and headed back to her friends.

"Guys I am not feeling well. Can we go?" Willow asked

"Sure Willow. Are you alright?" Cordy asked concerned.

"Yeah, just tired." Willow said. "Let's go to my place."

"I'll call Giles to meet us there." Xander said quietly he knew something was up.

Twenty minutes later they were all seated in Willow's living room.

"What happened Willow?" Spike asked.

"When I was going to the bathroom Graham approached me. He was wondering how I was doing and said he hoped I get my memory back soon." Willow said holding Angel's hand.

"They really want to get you back into that lab." Doyle said

"But we still don't know why." Cordy said.

"We will sooner or later." Giles replied.

"But what am I suppose to do for now?" Willow asked.

"Continue like you don't remember anything." Buffy said.

"Fun." Willow said rolling her eyes. The last couple of months had been hell for her, and now that she remembered who she is and she can't be herself.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

A couple weeks passed, and the group still didn't know what the Initiative wanted with Willow.

"I am going to go for a walk." Willow said putting on her coat.

"Want us to come with?" Cordelia asked.

"No thanks. I just need some me time." Willow replied.

"Willow it isn't safe for you." Angel stated worriedly.

"It's ok I will just pretend I don't remember anything." Willow reassured her boyfriend.

"Please be careful and make sure your back before the sunsets." Angel pleaded.

"I will be back way before sunset." Willow promised and kissed him and left the house.

Willow walked around for a couple hours she was glad to be away from the house.

"Willow!" Someone called behind her.

The redhead turned around and saw Graham.

"Uh hi," Willow said uncomfortably.

"How are you doing?" Graham asked.

"Fine." Willow replied.

"Why don't I walk you home?" Graham offered.

"No I am ok thank you." Willow replied and started to walk away.

Graham grabbed her putting a cloth over her mouth and nose Willow passed out in seconds.

"Willow should have been home hours ago!" Angel stated worriedly.

"Why don't we go and do patrol we will prolly bump into her." Spike recommended

Doyle grabbed his head his demon form coming out.

"Baby what did you see?" Cordelia asked handing him his flask.

"Willow." Doyle said taking a big gulp of his whiskey. "They got her."

"Shit!" Xander swore.

"Are they at the Initiative?" Riley asked.

"Looked like it." Doyle answered. "I think they are trying to drain her power."

"Come on!" Buffy ordered as the grabbed weapons and headed to the cars.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

"Graham, why are you doing this?" Willow asked nervously she was strapped down.

"You are very powerful. We could use that power." Graham answered.

"You can't take my power!" Willow said angrily.

"You can't stop us." Graham smirked as he tried to stick a needle in her arm.

Willow said a couple of words and the needle flew out of his hand she then said another couple words and the straps disappeared. She jumped up and ran to the door opening it and then doing a spell to put up a barrier. She looked around trying to figure out how to get out. She ran down the hall and snuck into a different room. There was another door and she opened it gasping when she saw Graham standing there with a needle. He stabbed her in the arm. Willow started to feel dizzy. She looked around the room and saw they were barrels of liquids that showed they were not to be near heat. She concentrated as hard as she could and started a fire.

The group showed up at the Initiative jumping out of the car and running into the building. Angel could smell Willow and they headed in that direction.

"You stupid bitch!" Graham shouted and backhanded her.

Willow fell on the floor. She knew she needed to get out of there or she would be blown up with the rest of them. She kicked Graham's legs from under him, and forced herself to her feet. Stumbling out of the room she ran down the hall she would stumble and fall, but she would pick herself up again. She turned a corner and bumped into someone falling to the floor again.

"Willow!" Angel said picking her up.

"It's going to blow we need to get out." Willow said before passing out.

The group ran back the way they came and got outside as the building blew. Angel covered Willow's body with his as debris feel around them. They got into the cars and headed back to Willow's house.

The next morning Willow woke slowly and looked beside her Angel was sleeping.

"Angel." Willow whispered.

"Hmm?" Angel asked.

"Angel." Willow said again.

"Willow?" Angel asked opening his eyes.

"Hi." Willow smiled.

"Are you ok?" Angel asked sitting up.

"Yeah I didn't have a chance to tell you they drugged me." Willow said and kissed him.

"Are you hungry?" Angel asked after they broke the kiss.

"I am starving." Willow replied getting out of bed and headed downstairs Angel right behind her.

Everyone was in the kitchen.

"Morning," Willow said sitting at the table.

"Willow, are you alright?" Xander asked hugging her.

"Yeah I am great. They drugged me I didn't have a chance to say anything." Willow returned the hug.

"I am glad you are safe." Giles said.

"So is there anything left of the Initiative?" Willow asked.

"Nothing," Riley replied.

Willow put her head down she started that fire how many people were killed?

"Willow you did what you had to." Angel said putting a plate of toast in front of her.

"I know, but I killed them." Willow whispered.

"Willow you feel bad about that and that is a good thing, if you didn't there would be something wrong. In time it will pass not completely but it will." Giles said softly.

"I know." Willow stated.

"And I will help anyway I can." Angel promised and kissed her head.

"Thank you." Willow smiled, "I think I need a vacation. Think I could come up to L.A for a bit?"

"You know you are always welcome." Angel smiled.

The End


End file.
